How to Build Self Esteem Forever

Posted by Yohannes Zewde August 24, 2012

Written by Dia

For more self improvement articles visit http://www.pickthebrain.com/

 

Dia is the founder of 2 Achieve your Goals and is a freelance contributor to many national self improvement blogs.

 

Self-esteem is the way you judge and look at yourself.  Some people believe that their appearance will enhance their level of self-esteem, but in reality, having high self-esteem comes from the ability to see yourself special and unique all the time.

 

Do you see yourself as special and unique?

Do you have high self-esteem?

Do you love yourself?

No?

Here is a quick 5-point guide to build self esteem when you forget how great you are:

 

1.  Believe in your inner beauty: Don’t say to yourself that you are not beautiful nor unique.  Know that every person is unique and true gift to the world.  There is no one on earth like you and you have a lot to offer to humanity.

 

2.  Believe in your mind power: Know that the way you see yourself comes from the power of your thoughts and mind.  Use your mind power and the power of your thoughts to develop love for yourself.  Once you begin to see yourself as unique, people around you will begin to see you in the same way.

 

3.  Focus on your positive qualities: You have to realize that you as a human being have good and positive qualities, so begin to focus on what you have going for you instead of focusing on your negative qualities.  Always surround yourself with people who think you are beautiful and who enjoy your company and your positive qualities.  Focusing on your positive attributes and surrounding yourself with positive friends will help you better accept yourself and hence build your self esteem.

 

4.  Overcome your negative habits: If you have a negative habit that you don’t like, make plans to get rid of it.  Once you substitute your negative habit with a positive one, your self-esteem will improve.

 

5.  Compliment yourself: Compliment yourself on what you like about your looks, your positive attributes, and every time you do something right and nice for yourself and others.  Do this each and every day until it becomes a habit.

Always remember what Anna Freud said, “I was always looking outside myself for strength and confidence but it comes from within. It is there all the time.”

5 Truths That Will Transform Your Life

Posted by Yohannes Zewde August 24, 2012

Written by Surabhi Surendra

For more self improvement articles visit http://www.pickthebrain.com/

 

Rather than love, than money, than fame, give me truth. – Thoreau

 

We all prefer to live by our own rules. These are often trial and error methods. We make mistakes, learn a lesson from them and avoid them in future. A wise way to live life is by learning from others’ mistakes. With eons of wisdom and experience, there are some golden rules that hold good for every one. 

These are those few truths that have been proving their worth and success since ages. If these few lessons are learned by heart and life is lived by following these, I am sure you can experience a new birth. 

No decision is good or bad, it is the end result that matters: This is undoubtedly the best lesson I have learned in life. Like Shakespeare said, ‘alls well that ends well’. You do something different and you will be criticized but if the same decision turns out to be fruitful in the end, you will be applauded. There are countless examples where scientists, philosophers, writers and entrepreneurs were panned for their new thought, process and creation but when the same idea worked well, they were rewarded and revered. 

So the point here is to first make a sensible decision and then stick to it. Defend it and work to make it successful. Stop pondering over why did you do something in the past or why did you take some decision. Pause for a while and decide to carve out a path from the same thing onwards. Whatever happened, has happened. Now excel in whatever you are doing and it will be alright. 

90% of us have the same level of talent. It is the attitude that determines our altitude: It is very often that we attribute success of others to their talent or destiny. But the reality is that we all human beings have almost the same level of talent and capability. Just that we have different priorities and different aptitudes. And yeah! Different attitude. Our attitude determines the course of our life. 

Do no ever feel you don’t have it in you. Instead say you will develop it in you. Take inspiration from legends. Work towards your goal. Quantify your goals and take the steps forward without wondering whether you have it in you or not. 

Never think of problems, think of solutions: I have been through this in the initial years of my career. In those times, while working on the project, I used to think more about problems. I had a critical attitude. I was always ready to criticize my project. Though the reason was that I was utterly unhappy with my career at that point but if I look back now, I feel maybe I was unhappy because I never took the time out to appreciate the good things about my project. Agreed that my project had some problems but instead of finding solutions to those problems, I focused more on the problems themselves and thus I could not get anything useful from that experience. 

I changed this mindset entirely after reading a lot online and working on my career and attitude and by figuring out what I actually liked. Thinking in terms of solutions helps us in becoming optimistic. It enhances our logical reasoning and improves our overall productivity. While being fixed at problems will only give us negative views and results in pessimistic behavior. 

Honesty is always the best policy:  This is probably the first maxim that we read as children but I doubt if all of us actually put it into practice. In todays world of cut throat competition and piling peer pressure, giving up honesty seems to be the easiest and the most convenient thing to do. But let me assure you that honesty always pays back in terms of rewards. You may not see them in short term but they are always there in the long term. 

I remember my dad used to get frustrated seeing his colleagues taking bribes and living a luxurious life while he normally struggled to get all his ends met. But now after about 35 years of work, he now feels that his honesty in work and in life has paid him off very well. He feels happy that he is regarded as an honest man, has got reliable friends and that he has emerged as a stronger, happier and contented man, while his same colleagues are facing problems of unethical work practice charges and most of them are worried about their children’s misconduct.

The moral is if you are honest with life, your life will be honest with you and will not cheat on you! 

Only keep the essentials, cut the unnecessary and you will achieve more: This is the most insightful lesson I have learnt from my husband. He is a man who firmly believes in ‘simple living, high thinking’. He never had a mobile phone even though he was working thousands of kilometres away from his family. After getting selected for India’s most reputed and highest civil services exam, he got a phone only on my insistence. He always considers phone as a major source of distraction. Contrary to his belief, I used to be addicted to my phone and internet. But now after being with him for 3 years, I also keep my phone on silent mode! 

With silent phone, switched off TV, shut down laptop and a playful daughter, we are able to spend some wonderful moments together which was not the case earlier when these gadgets would keep running almost always. We must cut down the extra stuff from our life for better focus and attention. 

This applies not only to gadgets but also to people. Cut down the extra, weighty strings of attachments form your life and focus that energy on the people you need the most. Throw away the things you don’t need and take extra good care of the things you depend upon. With better concentration, you will achieve better results. That is my guarantee.

Twenty Two Reasons To Never Give Up

Posted by Yohannes Zewde August 24, 2012

Written by Diggy; For more self improvement visit http://www.pickthebrain.com/

 

At some point in the various journeys we embark on in our lives, we get to a part where we feel like giving up. Sometimes we give up before we even start and other times we give up just before we are about to make that huge break-through that we have been putting so much effort in to achieve.

I have created this list of 22 reasons why you should never give up and I hope that you will find it before you give up, so that I can inspire you to keep going!

1- As Long As You Are Alive Anything Is Possible: The only valid excuse you have to give up is if you are dead. As long as you are alive (and healthy and free) you have the choice to keep trying until you finally succeed.

 

2- Be Realistic: The chance of mastering something the first time you do it is almost non-existent. Everything takes time to learn and you will make mistakes. Learn from them.

 

3- Michael Jordan: Arguably the best basketball player of all time. He attributes his success to all his failures. He just never gave up even when he knew he had missed over 300 shots and had missed the winning shot of the game many times. Every time he got knocked down he got back up again.

 

4- Lance Armstrong: Lance was diagnosed with serious cancer that had spread throughout his entire body. He had cancer cells the size of golf balls in his lungs. Despite all odds he overcame the cancer and set out to win the Tour de France 6 Consecutive years in a row.

 

5- Muhammad Ali: “Float like a butterfly, sting like a bee”. Muhammad Ali is one of the best boxers the world has ever known. He suffered only 5 losses while having 56 wins and was the first boxer to win the lineal heavyweight championship three times. This is a guy who literally knows how to get knocked down and get back up.

 

6- The Man Who Created The Marathon: Very long ago an Athenian herald was sent to Sparta to get help when the Persians landed in Greece. It was said that he ran 240km in 2 days and after that he ran 40km to announce the victory of the Greeks only to collapse and die on the spot from exhaustion. If you ever feel like things are difficult, imagine what it would be like to run 240km in 2 days. (Don’t try that because you might die from it, but use it as an inspiration).

 

7- Chris Gardner – The Pursuit of Happiness: Have you seen the movie “The Pursuit of Happiness”? It is based on the life story of Chris Gardener, a man who went for the lowest of the lows in an environment where most people would give up (no money, no job) to the highest of the highs (A millionaire with his own investment firm). If you ever think about giving up, watch this movie!

 

8- Kanye West: I’m pretty sure you have heard of the rapper Kanye West. Read his story. He is a big inspiration for me and proves that you can go from having very little to being among the most famous and respected people in the world.

 

9- Nelson Mandela: Campaigned for justice and freedom in his South Africa. He spent twenty years in jail for his opposition to apartheid. On release he healed the wounds of apartheid by his magnanimous attitude toward his former political enemies.

 

10- You Are Strong: You are stronger than you think. One little setback is not enough to stop you from achieving your goals. Neither are 10 or 100 or 1000 setbacks.

11- Prove Yourself: You don’t want to be known as someone that is weak and gives up. Go out there and prove yourself to the world and to yourself. You CAN and WILL achieve what you set out to do. The only time you fail is when you give up.

 

12- Has It Been Done Before? If someone else can do it then so can you. Even if it is only one other person in the world that has achieved what you have set out to achieve, that should be reason enough for you to never give up.

 

13- Believe In Your Dreams: Don’t sell yourself short. In life there are going to be many people who will try to bring you down and tell you what you want to achieve is not possible. Don’t let anyone destroy your dreams.

 

14- Your Family and Friends: Let the people you love and who mean the world to you be your inspiration to persist and persevere. Maybe you need to try a different angle, study more or practice more but don’t give up!

 

15- Because I Tell You To: Not that I am any sort of guru or Godly figure, but if you want to give up then don’t. Just because I’m telling you not to.

 

16- There Are People Worse-Off: Right now there are many people who are in a worse situation and environment than you are right now. Are you thinking about giving up running 5 miles a week? Think about the people who are unable to even walk and how much they would give to be able to run 5 miles every day.

 

17- Improve Our World: When you achieve whatever you set out to achieve you can use your success to make a difference to the world or other peoples lives.

 

18- Get Rich or Die Trying: Like Fiddy (50 cent) says, “Get rich or die trying”. 50 Cent is rich, he made it (although he did get shot 9 times). Face your fears and don’t take the easy way out by giving up.

 

19- Let The Haters Hate: There will always be haters. There will always be plenty of naysayers  and people who try to tear you down. Don’t pay attention to them and don’t take what they say to heart. Let the haters hate and you keep believing in yourself.

 

20- You Deserve To Be Happy: Don’t ever let anybody tell you otherwise. You deserve to be happy and you deserve to have success. Keep that mindset and never give up until you reach your destination!

 

21- Inspire Others:

Be an inspiration to others by refusing to give up. Who knows what someone else can achieve because you never gave up and in turn inspired them not to give up.

 

22- You Are So Close: Often when you feel like you want to give up and you are about to give up you are so close to making a huge break-thru. Seth Godin has written an awesome book about this called “The Dip” – a riveting read that teaches that at any given time you are always just a heartbeat away from success.

Three Ways to Stay Calm and Persevere

Posted by Yohannes Zewde August 24, 2012

Written by Marcella Chamorro; for more happiness and self improvement articles visit http://www.pickthebrain.com/ 

When there is a problem in your business you know you will have to deal with, you can do several things. You can give up, which isn’t a good idea if you want to keep your business profitable. You can make a snap decision, which can get you into even deeper issues. Or you can persevere. But what does perseverance mean? Well, perseverance is steady persistence despite obstacles or issues. There are three ways that people persevere. 

1. Enduring: This is the first type of perseverance. Comparable to an ostrich sticking its head in the sand, someone who endures makes no move at all. In fact, they ignore the fact that anything is wrong. This is a good way to allow a bad situation to evolve into an even worse situation. 

2. Struggling: This is the second type of perseverance. Immediately reacting to the issue, these people jump into a hornets nest without any prior planning. They fight and rail against injustice and difficulty, but to no avail. All flash and no substance, their struggles are in vain because they do not have a plan. All the effort in the world will be unsuccessful if you don’t plan ahead. 

3. Waiting: The third type of perseverance is the productive one. The balance between endurance and struggle, waiting implies action in the future. No jumping in where angels fear to tread and no digging down in a fox hole. Just quiet, thoughtful planning before you make a move. Like a game of chess, every strategy and countermove must be thought out before the first piece is touched. This is the mark of a successful over comer of problems; the ability to stay calm and rational and still make a decision. 

But how do you stay calm? Stress is a huge part of life. We all go through stress at some point. It might be at work, it might be at home or with friends. Whatever the case is, getting upset just makes a stressful situation more difficult. But how do you stay cool, calm and collected in the midst of a storm? Well, here are three ways you can handle your reaction to the stresses in your life:

Breathe – One of the most common reactions to stress is holding your breath. That or hyperventilating. Neither one is very effective. Those reactions are due to your fight or flight reaction, and just increase your anxiety level. Combat that by thinking about your breathing. Take deep, slow breaths, using your stomach and not your chest. You’ll be surprised at how much this lowers your stress level… and your blood pressure. 

Go to a quiet place – Now, I’m not suggesting you can always physically get away from the stress in your life. But even in the middle of an argument, you can find a quiet place. Shut your eyes for a moment and quiet your mind. Picture somewhere peaceful, safe, and serene and go there. Even just a second’s reprieve will keep you from being overwhelmed. 

What is the worst that can happen? – Worry about the future is a huge stressor. Even in a simple argument, your stress increases because you fear for the future- of that relationship or just of the night. But if you take a minute to think, you’ll realize something. What is really the worst that can happen, and how would you deal with that? Once you have a plan in place for the very worst, it no longer seems so stressful. 

I’m not trying to offer you solutions to avoid stress, just to keep from being overwhelmed by it. The more upset you let yourself get, the worse the stressful situation will become. Be a rock in the middle of a storm, unruffled and unmoved. If you stay calm, the situation will only get better. 

There are certain universal truths in the world. One of which is that there will be problems. In business, as in life, problems are inevitable. It is the way you handle those problems that determine how successful you are. Remember not to leap without looking, nor to ignore the obvious. Keep balanced stay alert, and make your move when the time is right. That is the way to successfully overcome obstacles.